


Forever Rivals

by Akiko_Natsuko



Series: Gratsu [81]
Category: Fairy Tail
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Established Relationship, Fear, Guilt, M/M, Memories, Post-Alvarez Teikoku | Alvarez Empire Arc, Promises, Trust
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-20
Updated: 2020-07-20
Packaged: 2021-03-04 20:27:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,700
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25412371
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Akiko_Natsuko/pseuds/Akiko_Natsuko
Summary: “Gray,” Natsu interrupted, closing the last of the distance and reaching out to grasp his hands, burning warmth a balm against the chill Gray’s dark thoughts. “We’re always going to fight. We were rivals before anything else,” he squeezed Gray’s hands. “We’re still going to be rivals on some level even when we’re married, or when we’re old and grey.” That derailed Gray for a moment, and he gaped at Natsu, unable to react as the Dragon-slayer shifted his hold until he had Gray wrapped up in a tight hug. “That hasn’t changed, and it’s not going to, I promise.”
Relationships: Natsu Dragneel/Gray Fullbuster
Series: Gratsu [81]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1188718
Comments: 2
Kudos: 49
Collections: Gratsu Week 2020





	Forever Rivals

**Author's Note:**

> Please note that if you want to talk to me about my fics and writing, or anime/shows/games in general then you can now find me on discord [The Unholy Trinity](https://discord.gg/6sSddAWa5c).

Gray had been more hesitant than he’d let on when he’d agreed to spar with Natsu after an unusually quiet morning in the newly repaired guild. It wasn’t that he didn’t want to train with the Dragon-slayer. After all, that had been a staple of their friendship and later relationship. Even if it had initially started off as a way to beat the hell out of one another and trying to one-up the other. There had always been a rush to fighting Natsu in those situations, to be the centre of his focus, and to see the Dragon-slayer treating him as seriously as he did Erza and Gildarts when he challenged them. They had honed their skills on one another over the years, and even when the rivalry had eased and softened into friendship and more, they had been each other’s testing board. He had missed it like crazy the year that they were apart, especially when he had been trying to master his Devil-slaying magic without Natsu there to match him.

But that had been before they’d fought one another in earnest.

Now, as he found himself ducking out of reach of a flaming fist, flinging up an ice shield as defence rather than retaliating, all Gray could see was that fight in the middle of the war raging around them. The rage that had fuelled him them was long gone, but it wasn’t forgotten. There were still nights when he would wake up in a cold sweat from nightmares where Erza hadn’t stopped them in time, where he had destroyed Natsu rather than helped to save him. _I could have killed him._ It didn’t help that he knew that Natsu hadn’t been any more in control than he had been in that moment, or that the Dragon-slayer could have killed him too, all he could remember was the rage and intent.

The desire to hurt, to destroy…to kill.

He flinched, falling back with a stumble as Natsu’s flames shattered the shield, and came a little too close for comfort and this time even the Dragon-slayer couldn’t miss the fact that something was wrong. “Gray, what the hell?” Natsu demanded, dropping his fists and halting a short distance away, scowling at him. “You’ve been distracted from the start, and you’re barely even trying.” Gray almost smiled at the petulance in those words, wishing that he could forget as quickly as Natsu seemed to, and he hesitated for a moment, not sure that he wanted to dredge up what had happened if Natsu had managed to move on. But, as he glanced down and saw his hands trembling a little as he curled them into fists, feeling an echoing quiver in his heart, he knew that he needed to say something.

“Have you forgotten what happened last time we fought properly?” The words crept out, the guilt as heavy now as it had been during the awful, awkward conversation they’d had in the infirmary once everything was done, and Porlyusica was working on the mess the Fire Mage had made of his arm.

“No,” Natsu’s voice was just as soft, which surprised Gray because the Dragon-slayer had been acting as though nothing had happened since the moment, he had accepted Gray’s apology. Looking at him now, he realised that Natsu wasn’t as relaxed as he’d thought he’d been, a tension in his shoulders and jaws, a focus that he rarely showed when it was just the two of them. As though he was also worried about going too far. “No, I haven’t.” 

“Then, how…?” _How can you fight me as though nothing as changed? As though you trust me not to go too far?_ Gray wanted to demand, but he didn’t have the words. Realising as he trailed off, that was part of the problem. He didn’t trust himself. E.N.D. was gone, they had made sure of that, Natsu was the only one his body, the only one controlling his actions, and as destructive as he had always been, he had never lost control when he had been himself. But Gray… Gray still had his devil-slaying magic, the darkness was still there, lurking beneath the surface and waiting for him to lose control, and it scared him in a way that it hadn’t before he’d gone after Natsu.

“I trust you.”

The words, spoken in a soft voice that he rarely associated with the Dragon-slayer made him lift his head to look at Natsu, immediately wanting to look away again as he saw the knowing look in Natsu’s eyes. As though he knew precisely what Gray had been thinking and where his memories had gone. “How can you say that?” Gray demanded, forcing himself not to look away again. “I tried to kill you, and maybe I wasn’t in control back then… but what if I lose control again?” The last bit came out as a whisper, as he gave voice to the fear that had been niggling at him from the moment Natsu had all but dragged him outside to spar. It wasn’t just fear that he would lose control again, although that ran deep. It was fear that Natsu wouldn’t be able to stop him if it happened again, or that Erza wouldn’t be around.

“Gray,” Natsu had moved closer while his thoughts ran in circles around him, and he blinked and recoiled a little at finding the Dragon-slayer so close, and if Natsu noticed he chose not to comment. “I’ve always trusted you, and that isn’t going to change. I trusted you when we were little more than rivals,” he grinned now, the kind of grin that had Gray torn between wanting to hug him and punch him. Possibly both at the same time. A unique feeling that only Natsu had ever been able to evoke in him, and it settled him more than words ever could because it meant that not everything had changed.

“But…”

“Gray,” Natsu interrupted, closing the last of the distance and reaching out to grasp his hands, burning warmth a balm against the chill Gray’s dark thoughts. “We’re always going to fight. We were rivals before anything else,” he squeezed Gray’s hands. “We’re still going to be rivals on some level even when we’re married, or when we’re old and grey.” That derailed Gray for a moment, and he gaped at Natsu, unable to react as the Dragon-slayer shifted his hold until he had Gray wrapped up in a tight hug. “That hasn’t changed, and it’s not going to, I promise.”

“If I lose control again…” Gray wanted to believe him, and he knew Natsu meant every word that he was saying, but the fear wouldn’t let him go that easily, and all he could see was Natsu bloodied and hurt, staring at him with tears trickling down his face as he came back to himself.

“Then lose control,” Natsu ordered, and there was a challenge in his voice that worried Gray had had him pulling away, yanking himself free of the Dragon-slayer’s embrace.

“What?”

“I said ‘lose control’,” Natsu repeated, proving that Gray hadn’t imagined things even though he had hoped that he had been.

“How can you say that?” He demanded, and there was a spark of anger amongst the fear now. He knew that his partner was a reckless idiot at times, but to say something like that? To encourage it? He shook his head, backing up, hands balling into fists, and Natsu followed, slow and deliberate, eyes locked on Gray’s.

“Lose control,” Natsu repeated again, and there were a spark and a burst of heat as flames erupted around his hands as he took another step forward and then another. “Show me what you have, go all out against me with everything you have.” Challenging, demanding, any shadow of the memory of their last fight had disappeared from his eyes, and he was utterly focused on the present.

“No!” Gray shouted, backing up further. He didn’t know what Natsu was thinking, or where he thought this could go, but Gray wanted nothing more than to get out of there. This whole spar had been a bad idea. He didn’t trust himself, and even if Natsu did, what he was suggesting was…

His world turned to fire, as Natsu lunged and he only just managed to get a shield up in time to stop the attack, but it was hastily formed and shattered beneath the Dragon-slayer’s attack. There was no time for him to pull up a more robust one, because Natsu was there, all traces of his grin gone from his face as he attacked relentlessly. Pushing. He was pushing Gray to fight, to do more than just defend himself, the Ice Mage realised distantly, but he couldn’t bring himself to do it, instead throwing up shields and defences. “Natsu! Stop this!” _Stop pushing me before I do something I regret,_ he thought desperately, feeling the darkness stirring, wanting to fight. Wanting him to fight. A glance at his fingers, showing that they were starting to turn black as his control wavered, and he slammed his hands together. “Ice-Make: Lance!” He roared, trying to force Natsu back enough to give himself room to calm down or get the hell out of there. _Please, Natsu…_

His pleas went unheard, Natsu’s attacks intensifying in response to his. “Come on, Gray, is this all you’ve got?” The Dragon-slayer goaded, and this time Gray didn’t shield in time and found himself being flung backwards, crashing into a pile of pallets leftover from the repair work on the guild. He was on his feet at once, a glistening ice hammer formed before he had even consciously thought about it, and he brought it down on Natsu with the full force of his rising anger. The Dragon-slayer took the attack, making no effort to dodge it, letting it knock him back a few steps before rallying. Now he was grinning, the kind he wore when a fight was getting serious, and him with it, and a moment later it felt as though the air itself was on fire as flames engulfed him completely. “You’ll have to do better than that,” Natsu told him, as the flames intensified and darkened, and his voice dropped to a low growl as he stepped forward. “Fire Dragon King Mode…”

 _He can still use that._ Gray hadn’t wanted to ask, not after everything that happened, but he had his answer here and now because the flames around Natsu were the Dragon-slayer’s but something more. “Natsu, don’t…” Even as he spoke, he realised that his plea was going to fall on deaf ears, Natsu’s expression was one of grim determination, eyes bright and fierce in the flame.

“Fire Dragon King’s Purgatory,” Natsu all but whispered, but he might as well have shouted it as the flames burst out of him in a spherical blast, rushing mercilessly towards Gray who realised a shield wasn’t going to be enough this time. Not against this attack. For a split second, he considered taking it, but his hands were moving, magic stirring as instinct took hold, and the darkness roared in his chest

The resulting clash of ice and fire, forced them both back and sent a wave of destruction across the courtyard that had the entire building rattling, and Gray was distantly aware of shouts and cries. But, he paid them no mind as the dust cleared to reveal Natsu stood in a small crater, staring at him, and Gray glared back, lips drawn back in a snarl.

“Is this what you wanted?!” He demanded, knowing without looking that the dark markings covered his right side now, the darkness as close a thought now, no longer simmering but bright and fierce, power humming across his skin as the air around him turned bitterly cold. He was breathing hard and fast, more angry than afraid now as he took a step towards the Dragon-slayer. “Does this fire you up, Natsu?” 

“Yes!” Natsu’s reply brought him up short because the Dragon-slayer was not just grinning now. He was beaming, the kind of smile that lit up his entire face and eyes, and one that Gray suddenly realised he hadn’t seen since before the war had started…and all because he had lost control? No, because he was fighting him properly, all out, just like they always had. “I told you, didn’t I?” Natsu asked. “I trust you.”

Gray wanted to hit him and hug him and kiss him all once. He was still angry that Natsu had pushed so hard and fast, and he blinked. He was angry, his magic crackling with it, but it was nothing like the rage he had felt back then. He hadn’t meant to slip into his devil-slaying magic, Natsu had forced his hand, pushed his control into slipping… but it hadn’t overwhelmed him. _This time,_ a small voice whispered, the doubt still lingering. Perhaps it always would, or maybe it would ease with time, Gray didn’t really know. All he knew was that this moment was different, he was different…Natsu was different.

It wasn’t the same as back then.

“You did,” he whispered, closing his eyes for a moment. _Natsu trusts me, and I trust him…_ His eyes opened again, and he met Natsu’s eyes, saw his grin widen and felt himself returning it, and it felt like he could breathe properly for the first time since he had agreed to this spar as he straightened. “I just hope you’re ready for me to kick your ass,” he declared, and it felt so right, so easy that it took his breath away, especially as Natsu immediately fell into a ready stance, flames around his hands.

“I’d like to see you try Ice Princess.”

****

“So… after we’re married?” Gray asked later when they were inside, nursing their bruises and having just escaped Erza’s lecture as their brawl had got more than a little out of hand once he’d loosened up. Although, her stern words had been somewhat ruined by the faint smile on her face, and he had been left wondering just who Natsu had talked too about his worries, or maybe he had just been blind to the fact that he was worrying more than just his boyfriend. He hadn’t had a chance to ask earlier, and now he leaned into Natsu’s side, curious especially when Natsu’s ears went pink at the question. “You’ve been thinking about that?

“Not really, Lucy was talking about it…” Natsu muttered, fidgeting with the end of the scarf and Gray lifted an eyebrow at the motion. He wasn’t lying exactly, but he wasn’t telling the entire truth and the Ice Mage bit back a smile as Natsu hurried to continue. “How in her books people get together or get married after a war, and she was looking at me as she said it…”

“Sure….” Gray hummed. He knew that Lucy was a romantic at heart, so he could see her saying something like that, but Natsu was still fidgeting. _He has thought about it,_ Gray thought with sudden certainty, heart beating a little faster, and he couldn’t resist asking. “So, how do you feel about it?” He knew it wasn’t a step they were ready for just yet, not with the doubts and memories that were still plaguing him, and he knew that Natsu was working on the Master to be able to take a higher-level mission, so anything else would have to wait. But he could also admit to himself at least, that it was something he wanted in the future.

Natsu’s ears seemed to get even pinker, but he must’ve picked up on something in Gray’s voice because he looked up at the Ice Mage and studied him for a moment, before ducking his head with a small grin. “Maybe if you manage to beat me one day,” he teased, and Gray smiled, hearing the challenge in the words. And the promise. Leaning in to kiss the tip of one burning ear, making Natsu look at him so that he could steal a proper kiss, his smile growing as he whispered against the Dragon-slayer’s lips.

“You’re on.”


End file.
